Stuff I Thought About

Everything You Need to Know About Scotland, Europe and Asteroids.

I'm a bit pissed off. Firstly because Scotland keeps holding refferendums on being independent from England & Wales, and keeps adding caveats like "we want a slice of the army" and "we want the gas fields", and hasnt yet asked for "our share of the national debt which is disproportionately large because we cannot sustain ourselves".

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Bathing is Twat Time

If you read my article on how Radox Must Stopp Selling Sperm then you might be delighted to know about my latest descovery.

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The Stage Divers Gospel

Taking on board everything I learned in the tinatus inducing days of my youth whilst going to rock clubs I thought it prudent to publish my definitive works on the lost art of stage diving before this dying art was forever lost.

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Are They OUR Jobs Then?

Yesterday I was at a BBQ at a friends house when two of the guests discussed in some detail their disdain over foreigners taking our jobs, and the question I asked was, "Are they really our jobs?".

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All Your Saints Were Drug Addicts

I know I do have a tendency to mock the afflicted, and I consider none more afflicted than Christians, but one thing has really been bugging me lately that I just have to air.

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How Not to Pickup Women

Why do I attract the freaks? I would dearly love to know the answer to this question.

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Things Should Blow Up More Often

The communication revolution has made the world smaller and more instant, three hour old news is passe, and there just are'nt enough natural disasters or plane crashes in the world to keep things interesting.

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Hollywood Films are Man Porn

Equality is a matter that is very dear to my heart, I believe in it like lunatics believe in God. I believe equality is not just a wonderful and magnificent thing but also that it is rewarding in itself. It's not a duty, it's a way of being that rewards you with insights into seeing the best in people.

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Are Unicorns Real?

A Unicorn is a horse with a horn on it's head.

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My Cat's Short Tail

I love my cat dearly, my sister gave him to me after my previous 2 cats had been killed in road accidents.

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The Depressing Truth About Intelligent Life on Other Planets

Did you know that within 1000 lightyears of planet Earth are 30000 planets suiteably distanced from similarly typed stars, in other words, 30000 potentially Earthlike planets exist in our local galactic neighbourhood.

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Celebrate Their Heathen Non-Believing Deaths

I woke up this morning to find that Twitter was awash with news of the tragedy in Japan.

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Radox Must Stop Selling Sperm

This is my demand, and it's quite simple. I want Radox to stop selling sperm.

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So you think your as awesome as me, do you?

Your wrong.

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Are you in the mood for Christmas yet?

We're getting closer to Christmas which means we are getting closer to that time of year when those fucking bible bashers come on the telly and tell us that the spirit of Christmas is all about the little baby Jesus.

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What do Women Really Want?

Looking through profiles on a dating site is like sifting through a packet of needles to find the sharpest one.

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What is the Correct Level of Clingyness?

Have you ever had a date or partner that was just a little bit too clingy?

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Whatever Happened to Good Old Fashioned Sex on a First Date?

Have I just got old or is meeting new people an antiquated way of doing things?

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Is Pride a Sin?

I was at a pride event recently, the Pink Festival in Cambridge, and a friend said to me "I don't get pride, I don't see the point of it. I'm gay but I don't need to ram it down anyones throats.".

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Are you a non-wanker?

Apparently "Hi non-wanker" is not a very good chat up line.

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Why do Dutch Lesbians Worship Chewbacca?

After one week in Dutchland my neatly trimmed Brazilian fringe has turned into a wookie. Was it the lack of a bath (I was showering but I usually bath when I shave), or was I just fitting into Amsterdam lesbian horte corture?

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How Much Did Dominos /pwn Me !?

Every month I have some friends over and we order two large pizza's for delivery from Dominos, and like all Pizza delivery places you can always get the second large pizza for free.

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Am I the Only British Citizen Who Isnt Using Double Speak?

It's too easy to crack the joke about hanging parliament so I wont, and it's far too easy to complain and moan about politicians so I wont do that either.

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How Much Bloody Respect do I Have to Show Before I Can Fuck Her?

Lesbians are an odd bunch, one moment they're all mad passionate love and wanting to move in and the next you're on your second date and she's already cheating on you.

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Recent Articles

Modern Games are 20 Years Old
Everything You Need to Know About Scotland, Europe and Asteroids.
SEO Is Not Free
Bathing is Twat Time
The Stage Divers Gospel

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